Well friends, we are 6 days into the new year… Did anyone happen to have any New Year’s resolutions this year? I haven’t heard much chatter about anyone’s if so…
I mean, I’ve never really been into New Year’s resolutions… In fact, I’m not really into New Years in general BUT I have tried to come up with resolutions… You know, New Year, New Me type of thing. (HA whata joke). Last year I was so excited, I got out my cute little blue journal/creative book and drew “2015 GOALS” at the top of a clean white page. And, you know what happened!? I stared at that darn page for a WEEK and could not come up with ONE THING! Not one. Ugh.
So, I tried again this upcoming year… Can anyone guess what happened? Yup, THE SAME DARN THING HAPPENED! I mean, of course, I thought of a few things such as workout more, eat healthier (HA. I love chocolate chip cookies too much), maybe not hit or back into any more poles, and yada yada… I was actually really frustrated on why I couldn’t come up with anything. “Come on, Caitlin get it together!!! It’s a new year, new start, what’s something I want to accomplish” I thought to myself. Well… Being frustrated didn’t help, so I had given up on the idea of having a New Year’s resolution until it finally hit me why I couldn’t come up with anything and what my resolution is.
I take goals really really seriously throughout the year. And for the past 5 years, I knew which direction to go so the goals I had made for myself were pretty big. I had hit the floor sprinting, worked my butt off, and achieved every goal I made for myself. Once my mind is set on something, there’s absolutely no turning back. With that being said, I’ve had a lifestyle that has been on the fast track and now that things are slowing down, I’m not exactly positive which direction to go. If you know me, you know I stress out HARD CORE (lol who says hard core?) over not knowing, so when I went to write down resolutions for the new year, I couldn’t because I simply don’t know.
Which now brings me to the most amazing part!! I HAVE FOUND MY NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION, PEOPLE!
Over the weekend, I was driving to my friend’s house thinking and worrying about life (eye roll) and one of my favorite gospel songs came on. This may be silly to some of you but I’m a sucker for gospel songs. Go listen to Lift My Life Up by Unspoken. (Or press play below.) The first line in this song gets me every time.
“You’ve bought me this far so why would I question you now?”
MAN, ARE YOU KIDDING! SO GOOD! (if you know and have seen my outbursts of excitement – it just happened.)
I may not be entirely sure what I am doing, where I should be working, what my goals are, how I feel, or if I should dye my hair orange (it would look really good, right? jk jk) but when I listen to this song, I am reminded that sometimes not knowing is okay. That God is teaching me to be patient and that He’s in control. When I listen to this song, I’m reminded of what my heart truly wants and that is wherever God is taking me, whatever He has me doing; I want it His way. Not mine. Because life my way never works and His way always does.
So if anyone is like me, the next time you feel confused or don’t know what to do or are just trying to figure out a darn New Year’s resolution (BLAH!), play this song. (I’ve been playing this song a million times the past couple weeks.) It’s my reminder to let go and let God and what my focus for 2016 is.